Pidgin Jokes

The Hall Porter at the Shanghai Club answers the phone.

Female Voice: "That belong Hall Porter? Well, my wanchee savvy, s'pose my husband have got, no got?"
Hall Porter: "No, missy, husband no got."
Female Voice: "How fashion you savvy no got, s'pose my no talkee name?"
Hall Porter: "Maskee name, missy, any husband no got this side anytime."

A houseboat owner had no cat, but each month the same item appeared on the accounts: "cat chow five dollar." He finally sent for his No. 1 Boy.

"What thing every month belong five dollar cat chow? My no wanchee see any more cat chow five dollar."

The next month there was still no cat on board -- but the account book read:

"Cat chow five dollar. One piece cat ten dollar."


The cook asked the visitor what he desired for dinner. Duck was chosen, but at that time, while ordinary duck was available, it was the particular season for wild duck. So the cook said, "Missi, my tinkee more better hab flyaway duck today. Can catchee walkee-walkee duck any time."


A coolie who was thrown off a horse, on arising from the ground, said, "My wanchee go topside he; he wanchee got topside my."